Amortentia Dolorosa

Afternoon of Wednesday, June 12th, 1974

Having apparated to behind the local pub, Lucky strode forward towards the Lestrange family farm. It was a short walk, and one he was reasonably familiar with, from varying times he'd visited or even stayed there.

When he reached the house, he walked up to the door and knocked politely. After all, there was no need to abandon his manners, even if he was rather irritated with the whole situation. He waited for someone to answer, idly using his wand to keep a stray goat from chewing at his clothes.

Roddy opened the door, wearing nothing but a long kilt, letting out a cloud of cabbage and onion scented air. "Lucky? What are you doing here? Wasn't expecting to see you so soon..."

He stepped back from the door, holding it open, "So, come in. Can't have you standing in the yard, letting the goats in." Roddy slipped the silver knife in his other hand back into the sheath in the back of his kilt. "Sev's in the other room with Ceofine and Clover -- didn't think he'd come away with me, but he's easier than you'd think. And more easy than that with a little whiskey in him, he is."

Lucky slipped through the door, moving himself close enough to Roddy that their chests were nearly touching.

"I'm here because no one thought to mention they were fetching our boy from school. Which means I've been wondering about his health for the last several days, since he hasn't been by the Manor," he said, in a cold quiet voice.

"I've letters, for Sev, and your Mum, though. Figured I might serve as mail delivery while I was at it." This was said in a more cheerful tone for general consumption as he slipped away from Roddy.

"Well, shit on it if I knew you were for having him for summer!" Roddy looked faintly offended, but thought on it a long few minutes. "Maybe you're right... You might well have said it to me, but it's all been in and out, these last weeks. It's the air, here. Just up the road a town or two, the feckin' UVF blew out the middle of Monaghan. Twenty three people, Lucky. Six of them Wizards and four more blood. Maybe, I'm not all screwed in, but the whiskey helps."

He picked up a bottle from the post table in the hall as he headed toward the kitchen. After a long drink, he offered it haphazardly to Lucky.

"Oi, mum, Lucky's here with a letter from Murphy."

"Just leave it on the post table, Lucius," she called back from the steamy depths of the kitchen. "I don't want to spill on it. Sure you're staying for dinner, aye?"

"Aw, shit, Roddy," he said, pulling the other man in for a hug. "It was just the typical use of the lab. You know my father gets touchy if I try to have people stay for more than a few days at a time."

He sighed and smiled. "I'm just used to seeing Sev drop by our labs most days all summer. I figure that way he at least has an out."

He took a swig from the whisky bottle, before handing it back. "If you'll have me, Mrs. Lestrange," he said cheerfully. "I'd much rather eat here, than go home to sit formally." He ladi her letter on the table, and made to follow Roddy.

"Sure, sure," came Brigid's voice from the kitchen, "Always enough for you, here."

Roddy laid a heavy hand on Lucky's shoulder for a long moment, looking like he might say something serious, but turned and made for the door of the greatroom. "I should check on Sev. Left him alone with two of the cousins, I did, and that can't be aught but trouble in the making."

With an alarmed squawk, Severus leapt backward from the greatroom, slamming directly into Roddy's chest. The sound of Ceofine's hysterical laughter followed him into the hall.

"Mother's tongue, Clover," it cackled, "I said he wasn't like us. They're uptight over in England."

Clover just sounded confused. "But what's not to like? I wasn't being mean!"

Severus grabbed at Roddy's shirt twice before realising he wasn't wearing one. "They're mad. They're out of their damned tiny minds. She -- he -- it -- Clover was touching me. Hands. On me."

Lucky started laughing, his laughter growing to fill the room for a minute at Sev's reaction.

"Severus, Severus, be patient. They're more affectionate than the rest of us," he said with a grin.

"And we're not all that uptight, Ceofine. Even if I'm not as relaxed as Roddy here. Sev's a special case."

He smiled at his younger friend. "You can always come hide from them at my house if you need to, Sev," he said.

"He's an odd one, Clover. You'll come to know him and his way." Roddy headbutted Sev, gently, and stepped around his friend, into the room. "Come and show him how you are with me, if he doesn't believe you've been gentle."

Clover bounced up off the overstuffed sofa and darted across the room, liquidly twisting around Roddy with an overheated kiss. Roddy held out a hand to Ceofine, who raised an eyebrow, and then stalked disapprovingly across the room to join its cousin and sibling. Ceofine, at times, was the last sensible one left in a room, and in its opinion, it wasn't sensible enough for that to ever be the case.

Roddy untangled himself from his cousins and looked over his shoulder at Sev. "That's right and normal, it is. It's the way we were all raised to be -- and double for Clover. You don't have to play, but you do have to know sometimes one of us will forget that you don't. Just tell us no, and we'll stop. I promise you that."

"Affectionate!?" Severus squawked, enraptured and disgusted, "That's -- he's -- those are his cousins."

He began to pay attention to Roddy, as the Irishman started to speak. "If I tell you no, any of you, you'll really stop?"

"Who wants toys that don't play back?" Ceofine asked, as if it were the most obvious thing in the world. "If you're not having fun, then we're going to get bored."

"Too true, it is," Clover chimed in.

Severus cocked an eyebrow at Lucky. Are they serious? Can they be trusted? Can people who do that sort of thing with their own cousins be trusted in any situation?

"Sev, your upbringing's showing," he said teasingly. "Most of Slytherin is related one way and another. And you don't see that slowing them down, in the dating. Just because I come from a family that's intermarried less often, doesn't mean I'm not aware of it."

He laughed again. "Of course they stop. I should know that well enough. The rest of the world isn't like some people, or the boorish Gryffindors you deal with."

"Gryffindors aren't all bad!" Severus protested, before catching himself, and turning colour, just a bit. "Most of them are, though. Almost all of them. Close enough."

He gave Lucky's first point some more thought. "We are almost all related to the Blacks, aren't we? And the rest to the Yaxleys, if not both. I suppose you're right. I just don't have any family to really compare to."

Walking up behind Roddy, he pried the bottle of whiskey out of his friend's hand. "Calms you down, well enough. Maybe it'll help," he muttered, taking a swig.

"There's a good lad!" Roddy ruffled Sev's hair, and reflexively wiped his hand on his kilt. "Just be careful how much of it you drink. We don't want to hold you up by your ankles all night while you waste my mum's good cooking."

Ceofine stepped out to Lucky, asking quietly, "How are things with Murphy?"

"Of course they aren't. I meant some of them in particular," he said with a snort. "But you see you'll have to watch that reaction, in certain circles. Some of your classmates' parents are cousins."

He walked over to Sev, and handed him the letter. "From your Mum," he said quietly.

He looked at Ceofine, and spoke quietly. "Murphy's doing well. She's not happy with things, but she's doing well. She sent a letter to Brighid," he said with a nod towards it. "I made sure they had everything they needed before I came here."

Severus opened the folded letter and glanced at it. As the blood drained from his face, he re-folded it and tucked it into the pocket of his robes. He took another swig of the whiskey before putting it back into Roddy's hand.

"I should read that later. Thank you, Lucius." Not 'Lucky', 'Lucius'.

Crossing the room, he sank gracelessly into a sofa, and curled himself as tightly into the corner of it as he could, while still remaining primarily vertical. He crossed his arms around his knees, and stared vacantly at the pattern on the rug, looking, horrifically enough, just like his mother's son.

Roddy watched Sev collapse in on himself, and did the only sensible things he could think of. "Clover, why don't you go upset Maitiu? He was looking to be good for it, last I saw him."

Clover smiled thinly and swept from the room, to hunt down Murphy's brother and heckle him into a swordfight. That was usually an afternoon's entertainment, if Maitiu could be caught in the mood for such things.

As his cousin left, Roddy draped himself across the arm and back of the couch, careful not to let too much of his kilt drape onto Sev. "Tell me, boyo, is it so bad as all that? Murphy's there to look after things, and my good lass won't let doing be done to your oul' wan. No fear for it. I'd say none's better for that work."

"Murphy's got things in hand, Sev. And I sent them dinner, and the like, before I came here. " He walked over to them, and sat on the ground in front it.

He reached out, and touched Sev on the knee lightly to get his attention, before pulling his hand back. "You're ours, Sev. And that means we'll care for you and yours like our own, right Roddy?" he asked in a quiet and serious voice.

"So it is. You're just another cousin, here. One from farther away, who doesn't like kissing, but a cousin no less for it." Roddy rested the hand that wasn't holding the bottle on Sev's shoulder. "And don't go saying it's not so. You're the one who just said we're all either Blacks or Yaxleys, in the end."

Severus was shaking and still staring bleakly through Lucky as he reached over his shoulder and shoved Roddy straight in the face. "Ass."

"I know you say you want to help, but I don't think there is help. I don't know that anyone can help. Sometimes things just are, and there's nothing to be done." He shook his head, and his eyes slid heavily down, but didn't close.

He nodded. "Fair enough for now," he said gently. "I was just checking on you because I hadn't seen you yet this summer. You know the invitation's permanent to come by and work in the lab. And that includes eating and sleeping there, if it's what's needed. But you have to know my money's just money, if it's needed. I'd rather help a friend, than buy a round in the pub." He sighed, and exchanged a rather meaningful look with Roddy.

"So what've the pair of you been doing the last few days without me?"

"Oh, I've been educating this little limey on why the English should all be taken out in the yard and hexed stupid, with very few exceptions. I think it's actually sinking in." Roddy tried to dodge the hand, the second time, but wasn't expecting Sev to grab at his hair, instead. "Ow, shite! I'm just taking the piss!"

"It's mostly been about music. D'you know he's got no sense of it, at all? Just a couple of lullabies and a dirty pub song." He shook his head, in amazement. "How do you make it past fifteen with no music?"

Severus smirked as Roddy screeched in horror, but said nothing until the Irishman was quite through. "We haven't a wireless, and my father never had one of those Muggle music things. It just wasn't important."

He thought before opening his mouth again. "I like the Velvet Underground," he said, smiling faintly, "and Lou Reed."

He snickered. "And yet, here you are with a house full of Englishmen," he said pointedly to Roddy.

"No music? Sounds like it's time for a shopping spree," he said looking at Sev. "You just tell me whether you want wizarding or muggle or both, to play music on."

Looking at the stubborn expression on the younger boy's face, he laughed. "And either you get new, or I replace all of mine, and hand you all I've got now. So you might as well take advantage," he said smiling.

"I can't, Lucky." Severus looked away. "It's not about money. It's about my father. I really can't."

And what's going to happen when he sees that someone's been buying fresh food? What happens if he thinks your mother's been hiding money from him, again? Roddy'd best be right about Murphy, or this will go bad in an awful hurry.

He rubbed the back of his neck. "But, I'm going to be here, all summer. There's lots of music here."

Roddy could feel the stiff fear pouring off of Sev. This kid is not right. Doesn't help he's been alone so long.

"Aye, we'll show you the good stuff. There'll be no disco in my house, eh, Lucky?" Roddy laughed, running his fingers through Sev's hair, and untwisting it, reflexively as he went. "I wonder how you'd look in war braids..."

"Would it help if your father thought it was in trade for summer work? Because you've been brewing for us for years," he said with a smile. "And don't you worry about me telling him, if I need to."

"I'll get what you want for the lab, and a wireless for you to take to school. You can hide anything you want at my house in the summers, you know that."

"And of course no disco," he said with a smile. "I'm sure there are plenty of other things we can listen to."

Severus was halfway through responding to Lucky, when what Roddy said finally sunk in. "If this 'disco' is as bad as you say, I hope never to encount -- !!! -- War braids!? What are you doing to my hair?!"

He looked back over his shoulder at Roddy, distrust and astonishment firm on his face. But after a few moments' silent staring contest, he gave up and turned back to Lucius. "Just don't make me look stupid," he sighed.

"Can't be done, Lucky. He'll take it and sell it. And regardless of my thoughts on the matter, I can't go hexing my own father, or anyone else, unless I want the Ministry breathing down my neck. Best just to avoid the situation, entirely. It's not like I don't spend all my time with you two, anyway." He twisted the edge of his sleeve in his fingers, obviously wanting to discuss anything else.

"Accio hairbrush." Roddy held his hand out, expectantly. "You know, we're old enough to relieve you of this problem, Sev. Don't need an answer just now, but if you should think it later, just tell us, and we'll arrange for some things. Isn't that right, Lucky?"

The hairbrush smacked into his hand, and he set it on the back of the couch and reached out again. "Accio Maggie's camping draught."

"You could have such fabulous hair, Sev. Like Murphy's side of the family -- rich black and smooth as silk." The potion dropped into his hand and he upended it onto Sev's head. "Keep still a minute or so. It's just Aunt Maggie's camping shower -- clean anything out of anything else in a few seconds, with no mess on the furniture. And it does finishing work, too, which is what I wanted it for, I did."

Lucky nodded, his eyes a cloudy grey. "Sounds just like what I told Murphy. If I'd known he was this much a pain in your arse, Sev, I'd have at the very least put the fear of Wizards into him a long time ago."

"And that's fair enough, about spending all your time with the pair of us. Just let me know, next time, if you're headed here straight from school. I was a bit worried when days had gone by and I hadn't seen hide nor hair of you." With that statement, he shifted to lay on his side, head propped in one hand.

"Right..." Severus said to Lucky, half distracted, as he tried to get his eyes around the back of his head to see what Roddy was doing to his hair. "He does fear Wizards, it's half the problem."

He twitched as his hair warmed, dried, and fluttered, fan-like, behind him, for a moment. "What is he doing to my hair? Roddy, what are you doing to my hair?"

Roddy rolled his eyes, dramatically, at Lucky. "Nothing strange. Go ahead and touch your hair, if you're so worried about it. It's fine. It's just a great lot cleaner and softer, it is."

He took the brush to Sev's hair, sweeping easily through it. "Maybe all the grease does something for it, after all."

Lucky laughed. "Of course it does, Roddy. It's just one of the choices he makes, to work with potions so much. I never did want mine that way for longer than it had to be."

He looked at both of them for a moment, "You do realise there are potions to protect your hair without leaving it greasy all the time, don't you, Sev?"

Severus cocked his head at Lucky, gaining a disapproving snarl from Roddy. "Those react with some of the more delicate things I work with. Olive oil, on the other hand, does not. It is better to be greasy than to have my hair turn blazing fuscia and then fall out. Or, worse yet, to inadvertently ignite dangerous fumes, via an unexpected chemical reaction with my head."

"Enjoying yourself, Roddy?" he asked, drily, before turning his attention back to Lucius. "What is it about this man that I cannot refuse?"

"It's my smashing good looks, Sev, dahling." Roddy laughed and began the first braid, hands moving surely and swiftly over Sev's hair. "And I enjoy you much more than I enjoy myself."

"And you're surely sure that things would catch fire on your head if you didn't use oil? What in Auntie's name are you after such a rough subject for?"

He chuckled. "Severus, Severus, my dear creature. Do recall that I am good enough at potions when I can be bothered to have held the top place in my year all through school. If you hadn't come along, with you passion for the subject, I daresay I might've been the best potions student for years."

He rolled his eyes, before gesturing with one finger. "Yes, some of the protective potions react with the more delicate works. And in those cases, one might want to use olive oil. But there are also things which react to it, and besides, I never did like leaving my hair that way longer than necessary. I'm not suggesting you fail to protect your hair, just that you might want to wash that protection out a bit more often."

"And as for the Red Menace over there, well, beauty, brains and wit, what's not to like?" he asked, fluttering his eyelashes flirtatiously at Roddy.

Roddy licked his lips at Lucky, grinning over Sev's head. "The things you say, Lucky! But for your mouth, who would ever believe that I had brains? It's the best kept secret in all of Slytherin, it is!"

He finished the first braid and started another. "Hmph. Red Menace, he says. That's Red Queen, to you, yeh saucy fiendling." As he shifted his weight to cut a better line, more of his kilt spilled into Sev's lap, revealing his naturally hairless legs, half to the knee.

"Why would I want to wash it out? It keeps everyone but this lackwit off me." Severus reached out to shove Roddy's leg, and encountered the unexpectedly smooth skin. His face twisted in horror. "You... That's ... Do you seriously shave your legs? Why?"

He sputtered a while longer, face reddening with the strain of first having touched Roddy's bare leg, and then having to process the unexpected.

Lucky snickered loudly. "Ahh, youth. Some day you'll discover that it can be fun to have people touch you, Severus," he said slyly.

"And you should blame your brother for that," he said, chuckling to himself. "If he hadn't said something, I might never have noticed. And that would've been a shame." Lucky stretched lazily, one hand reaching out to stroke Roddy's bare leg. "After all, we might not have become friends, else."

Roddy purred, stretching his leg against Lucky's hand. "It may be the only thing I'll thank him for, but I'll credit him that, I will. Bringing me to the attention of such a cold-looking beauty. I'm surprised you don't melt, some days, Lucky. You're far too warm to look as icy as Sev actually is."

He started another braid. "And I don't shave my legs, Sev. You'd be able to tell if I did. It's all part of my irresistible charm."

Severus looked patently nauseated. Two of the only three friends he had were queer? And the third friend hadn't been around much, since he'd taken up researching some of the older and nastier hexes. He sighed. The only two friends he had... and with each other. And one of them was playing with his hair.

It was revolting, really. Or, at least, he thought it was, but the harder he looked, the less basis he could find for that point. Except, of course, that he hated to be touched -- and he knew better than to imagine that was universal. He struggled not to think too much about the mechanics of things, because those thoughts would make him ill.

He had absolutely no idea what to make of any of this. He also didn't know what to make of the fact that he hadn't pushed Roddy off of him, in that first moment of horror. It was just that Roddy couldn't hurt him -- not in any serious or significant way. Scare the holy shit out of him, sure, but the redhead had some ... strange veneration for him, and he was fairly certain it didn't permit harm.

Finally, the last statement sunk in. "What, really?" Severus pushed aside his disgust and squinted at Roddy's leg. "No potions or anything? How utterly peculiar."

"Oh Roddy, don't be ridiculous. I'm only half warm with a handful of people. You know that." Lucky watched Sev carefully. Looks like Sev's finally catching on. Merlin, I thought we were going to have to hit him over the head with it.

"Pleasant, really," he said with a smile, his hand still running along Roddy's leg. "Even if it is rather like a girl."

Roddy slapped Lucky upside the head with the flat of his foot. "Like a girl!? Sure you'll see how much of a girl I am with my cock betwixt yer lips, yeh ratty limey gobshite!"

He muttered a few more obscenities under his breath as he started another braid. "Don't take it too much to mind, Sev. He's got all the wit of a wet sack of turnips, some days."

Severus swallowed hard, staring wide-eyed into the far corner of the room. His yellowish face was still tinged red, making for a rather unpleasant shade of orange around his cheeks, and he could feel the heat radiating from it. He managed a small squeak in response to Roddy's comment, and then tried desperately to ignore the conversation.

Lucky chuckled. "I didn't say you were a girl, you daft git," he said, shoving at Roddy's foot. "Just that the smoothness of your legs was reminiscent, since most men have hair on theirs."

He watched Severus, letting his amusement show on his face. "Merlin, Roddy, I think we've broken him. I guess he's not noticed us flirting before."

He kept watching for a moment, before addressing Severus. "You all right there?"

Alarm mixing in with the embarrassment, Severus turned his head very slightly, and faced Lucky with nearly a death's head grimace, instead of a smile.

"What? I --" His left eye contracted to a pinpoint and then relaxed again, and with it, the colour drained from his face, which fell into its usual dull countenance. The grey of his eyes almost seemed to crawl, at a glance. "Yes, of course. Why wouldn't I be?"

There's a reason you know.

Of course there is! Do you feel like telling me what it is? No? I didn't think so.

You're afraid of them. You're afraid they'll -- But, the rest of the thought dissolved into static, and swept away.

"And that's bad enough, that is, never mind that most of you have stubble on your faces. How many times I've ended up with a--" Roddy trailed off as he felt Sev's body relax and heard the sudden shift in tone.

His ears laid back as he looked at Lucky. What the hell was that?

Lucky watched as the myriad set of reactions crawled across the face of his young friend. Something is not right, here. Very not right. Ah buggering shite.

He saw as Roddy caught it too, and nodded very slightly. "Sev," he said quietly, his tone serious. "Neither Roddy nor I would ever push you into something you didn't want. And I'll leave you the book I lent Narcissa when she was nine, with hexes to remove a bloke's bits, if it'll make you feel better about it."

"Actually, I've read it. It's a nasty piece of work, isn't it?" Severus still looked perfectly calm, and didn't feel much different from appearances, aside from the hum of half-heard voices chattering across the back of his mind. "And I'm not really worried about either of you. If you were going to try something, you'd have done it, already. And he's not going to hurt me, because I saved his life."

The light went on in his head, and he tilted his head back a bit, to look at Roddy. "You actually can't, can you? I remember reading it once, that it's in your blood."

Roddy closed his eyes for a long moment, looking grim. "So it is. And if you ever share that scrap, he'll kill you for me."

He pointed at Lucky and stared down into Sev's eyes, watching the irises ripple, unsettlingly. It wasn't even visual, just sort of a perception of the fact that for some reason, they ought to be rippling. It was wholly disturbing.

"It is. And no one's felt the need to use it on me yet. Although I am a bit surprised to find you reading a book for pureblooded young ladies of the 18th century, Severus," he said teasingly.

"So don't mind Roddy and I, when we're playing around. You can always tell us to bugger off, after all." Lucky moved to stroke Roddy's leg again reassuringly, a puzzled look in his eyes.

"Research," Severus said with a thin smile. "You can't do the sorts of things I'm working on without seeing other varied applications of similar concepts. It was a rather concise exploration of the principles involved, and shortly I'll be able to do far worse than that book even hints at."

He brushed a wisp of hair back from his face, and was singularly unsurprised when Roddy hissed and put it back. The loony Irishman was still working. "I suspect I'll just have to get used to the two of you, like that. I hadn't considered it. I was ... surprised."

Roddy shrugged at Lucky with one shoulder, but addressed Sev. "I'll be done here in a minute. I promise I'll do the front ones before I finish the rest, back here."

"And as to us getting like that with you? We won't unless you let us." He tied off the end of a braid. "And it doesn't look like that'll be any time soon."

"Well, you've access to the Malfoy collections for that," he said with smirk. "And if you need it and can't find it, let me know. It might be in with the family's private collections, and for that I'd have to fetch it out myself." Lucky looked thoughtful for a moment,I hadn't realised that Sev was working so much with that sort of thing.

"I can pass you notes from some of the conferences I've been attending, if you want some other ideas. I was going to pass you the potions ones anyways. "

"Surprised?" he asked with one eyebrow raised. "Well, that's a polite enough way to put it. I was rather surprised myself, when this whole thing started. Up until this beautiful creature," he said, running a hand along Roddy's leg again, "I'd thought I just liked girls."

Roddy laughed freely. "Aye, I'm just irresistibly charming, I am. Girls, gents, anything that'll give me half a chance is fair game. And you're hooked, Sev. At least as hooked as a tightly wound thing like yourself is going to get, true it is."

He leaned down and purred against Sev's ear, "I can tell. You're not afraid of me touching you, because I'm not everyone else."

Severus shivered, slightly, shock splashing through his expression, and vanishing just as quickly. He reached over his shoulder, and his fingertips lingered on Roddy's skin a long moment before he shoved back, full force. "Ass," he muttered.

But, Roddy was right. He didn't let anyone else get this close to him, except his mother. Not even her, although the thought did cross his mind on a fairly regular basis. She was a Gryffindor, and therefore wasn't fair game again until they left school. A damn shame.

"Thanks, Lucky." The thin smile got just a little uglier. "I'll show you what I'm working on, if you promise not to share -- or to try it before it's well and truly done. I don't want any accidents with this. I'm not sure even St. Mungo's would be able to fix them..."

"Of course I won't," he said. "Same rules as with brewing in the lab. I won't play with your toys until they're done, and you won't play with mine." He smiled, a wicked, winsome smile. "After all, I have a few things in progress that I doubt St. Mungo's could handle, either."

He laughed, and flipped his hair out of his face. "Of course, lots of things I'm working on are still in the theoretical stages. Layering effects is such a very large pain in the arse."

Severus's eyes glazed over for a few seconds, and then a few more. "Layering... Lucky, you've given me a horrifying idea. Wholly ingenious."

He stuck out one hand and fished in his pockets with the other. "Accio quill."

Catching the quill, half-distracted, he started to write on the back of his mother's letter. "I have to get this down before I forget. I will bring into this world something to be feared. And then I will both have accomplished something worthwhile, and ensured that I will be damned well left in peace."

"Never saw the point in a hex. I can do more damage in much more enjoyable ways with simpler tools." Roddy shrugged and slipped the silver knife from behind his back. He seemed to idly let it drop from his fingers, but it struck centre on an old and worn dent in the floor, just beside Lucky's leg.

"Like that unlucky little snotrag from the UVF I caught bragging in a pub across the border, last weekend. I don't think I've ever heard such a welcome sound as the way he begged me to let him die." He grinned and flushed like a schoolgirl who's just been asked on a date, sliding his free hand down Sev's chest, to pull him closer for a moment, to share the thrill. "Maybe we are monsters. But they made us this way."

"Of course layering, Severus. Why else would these things be taking so much work."

"A bit of the old Ultraviolence is good, no matter how one achieves it. And I am almost finished with something that leaves them begging until they do die," he said. "Oh, I suppose it's done by some standards, but I want it to last for weeks as unbreakable." He smiled a manic grin, his eyes almost feverish.

"I'll have them rolling in the aisles, before I'm done," he said, before plucking the knife from the floor and tapping the flat against his forehead, "just rolling in the aisles."

Severus didn't pull back from Roddy, just raised his knee to give himself a surface to keep writing against. Made monsters... Perhaps we are, at that.

He blinked up at Lucky. "Why do I have a terrifying suspicion that I should fear your creations far more than my own?" He sighed. "But, I haven't been worried about layering this, because it's been a ground-up sort of affair. There was an enchanted sword in the seventh century that did something like what I'm trying, but that's the last trace that's been seen of that sort of thing. Genuine, physical brutality is far less rare in the Wizarding world than we all like to imagine, though, and this will be a vivid and essential reminder of the point."

Roddy finished the last few twists and rebraids of Sev's hair, tucking the ends through the plaits to hold them in place. "I do love it when you two talk dirty. It's vibrant and lush, the way you tell it. And just enough the mystery to keep me wanting more..."

His fingers stretched and clenched, against Sev's chest, like a cat stretching its claws, before he put the hand out, away from Sev's head. "Accio hand mirror. You need to see how you look in this, Sev. I think I built it right for your face."

Lucky smiled secretively. "Of course, Sev. I do have several years of experience on you, if nothing else. But physical brutality in the extreme is quite useful, as are things to which the majority of people as of yet have no counters."

Lucky looked to Roddy. "We each have our own charms, when it comes to violence, after all. It wouldn't be half so entertaining otherwise. And you are certainly quite skilled with these," he said, taking the knife in his hand by the tip, and offering it back to Roddy with a courtly flourish.

Severus smirked at Lucky and cocked an eyebrow. "I think Roddy will like me even better when I'm done with this. You might want to have a prybar on hand if I demo it, just in case you've got to pry him off me."

He took the back of the mirror to the side of the head, before Roddy moved it in front of his face. At first glance, he wasn't him. There was the nose, the same grey eyes and thin lips... but the cast of the image was strangely different. He wondered if this wasn't what his family was supposed to look like. In a word, he looked regal.

"H-- holy shit, Roddy." His fingers crept up to touch his hair and remind himself it was really his, to touch his face and prove it wasn't a reflection of someone else. "Magic mirror, isn't it. You're pulling my leg."

"You think so little of me that I'd need the help? That's all you in that glass, you thankless gobshite." Roddy tossed the mirror into Sev's lap and popped him atop the head with his empty fist. "You and my work. And if I can do this in less than half an hour, what more could I do in an hour or two, hm? And with my bare hands, I'll do it, mind!"

He grumbled irritatedly, stretching out fully along the back of the couch, to take the kink out of his back. "The things I do for the blind and the daft..." he snarled, snatching the knife back from Lucky. "At least you appreciate my work."

Lucky snorted. "To hell with a prybar. Imperius is more useful," he said, smirking.

Moving slightly to get a better look at Sev, he smiled. "And that, is why Roddy is so beautiful. He knows how to present absolutely anyone and everyoneto advantage. And perhaps now that you've seen what can be done, Severus, you'll let it be done more often."

Lucky leaned up from the floor to kiss Roddy for a moment, carefully not touching Severus. "Oh, stop feeling unappreciated, Roddy. It's new to him, looking like art."

Severus leaned away as Lucky stretched past him, catching the back of his head against Roddy's hip, as he turned to look at the two. "I didn't mean -- It's just -- Roddy, give me a break. I'm hideous. And Merlin smite me for saying so, but my mother's not a shining example of beauty, either. What am I going to think?"

He looked down at himself and reflected that he was really disgracing Roddy's work, with his ill-fitting, stained, and worn clothes. Bearing is the measure of a man, he reminded himself, but the contrast made it difficult to maintain any such thing. The two men with him redefined bearing with their ease and artistry, and even done up like a peacock, Severus didn't feel he stood at the same level.

"It won't happen often, Lucky. I feel like a fool and a faker." He shook his head and patted Roddy's elbow. "No offence, Roddy. It's just... jarring. Dreadfully unreal."

Roddy let himself be distracted by Lucky's kiss for a few long and delicious moments, while Severus tried to apologise. Just after the boy fell silent, he broke away and twisted himself around, nearly serpentine, to put his face mere inches from Sev's. He tucked a knuckle beneath Sev's chin, and forced his face up, to look him in the eyes.

"You are not a faker. You are not hideous." He tipped his hand, using a finger to force Sev's face back toward him as he tried to turn away. "This is what I have always seen, looking at you. I just had to make you see it."

"What do you think we all are at times, Sev?" he asked. "Do you think my father doesn't call me a bloody ponce when I'm put together, and a slovenly shame on my house otherwise?"

Lucky sighed, and rubbed at his face for a moment. "If there are things you need, things you want, to feel more like looking powerful is natural, then ask. I can provide them, and I don't want to hear excuses on why you couldn't accept them. Keep them at school, or at the Manor," he said with a pointed look.

"But don't let anyone make you feel you are less than powerful, less that a thing to be cherished. I walked that road too long myself, to want to see it in you more than I must. And you are to be valued, for who you are, and what you can do, if nothing else."

Lucky relaxed along the floor again, his point made for the moment, to see what the reaction would be.

Severus found himself frozen, caught up in the rich green of Roddy's eyes. Merlin's balls, no wonder the Irishman's so convincing... It wasn't until Lucky's words sank in that he was shocked into actually turning his head.

"Cherished? Cherished, Lucky? Now, you're just pushing the bounds of decency. That's not a word you just use." Even his expression objected to the grotesquery of the statement. "I was with you at 'powerful' -- though that's not something to be used vulgarly, like certain Gryffindors I know. I might even have been with you again at 'valued', since I've got to be of use to someone, even if it's just him." He cocked a thumb at Roddy. "But cherished? Your father's right, you are a ponce."

Roddy laughed so hard he lost his balance, toppling off the back of the couch and crashing into Sev. He grabbed the greasy limey around the waist, to keep him from sliding to the floor -- or worse, onto Lucky. "Balls," he cackled, "Huge brass balls."

He continued to giggle himself giddy, tears leaking from his eyes as his cheeks reddened from the strain. "I serve you because you saved my life, Sev. I like you because of your mouth, I do. You're the only greasy little half-a-mudblood to ever call the Malfoy heir a ponce to his face."

The hysterical laughter continued. "Merlin's balls, Lucky, you should see the look on your face."

With each word slipping from Severus' mouth, one could watch the icy mask of control slipping over Lucky's face further. He didn't even seem to notice being called a ponce. It figures He thought to himself. There have only ever been five people I've truly cared for. My mother's dead, and Andi's gone beyond reach, which leaves three. And these two can't even hear a bit of honesty without deciding it's ridiculous.

His normal facade in place over the feeling of rejection, he spoke. "It's hardly an insult, when I just used the word myself, boys. "

He looked at Sev speculatively. "And who said I 'just used' that word?" he asked archly.

"I never said it was an insult, Lucius. It just doesn't seem to be the right word in that context." Severus shook his head, and held out the whiskey bottle as a halfassed apology. "It's one of those words that old ladies use to talk about their cats and their tea sets. I am neither a cat nor a tea set. You are not an old woman. I have no idea how to take that without thinking of lace doilies and porcelain rosettes."

Roddy stopped laughing and let go of Sev. He reached out for Lucky. "Hey, take it easy. You know we don't mean anything by it. If he's not offended that I just called him a greasy mudblood..."

The sentence ended suddenly when Sev's elbow took him full in the ribs, knocking the air out of him. "There are some things you don't say twice," he wheezed.

Lucky shook his head, his hear falling into his face for a moment, and laughed.
And of course Roddy's barking up the complete wrong tree. Trust the Irishman for that.

"I'm hardly offended by being called a ponce mere minutes after I snogged you, Roddy. That would be absolutely ridiculous. Not to mention rather hypocritical of me."

"And no, I didn't meant porcelain and kittens. And I do hold that I used the word aptly."

Severus raised an eyebrow at Lucky. "I look appalling in lace, Lucky. And roses just aren't my thing. On this point, we will have to disagree."

There was a long pause as Severus counted on his fingers. "Isn't it your birthday?"

Dammit! I knew there was something... Pay attention!

"Aye, I think it is. Of course you know what we've got planned for you..." That much was true. Roddy had just forgotten the day was today. "Promise to leave you in a far room, Sev. You'll know nothing of it."

"Is it? Merlin's balls. I was too busy wondering where in the hell you'd gotten to to notice, Severus," Lucky said with a shake of his head.

He looked at Roddy. "I sense a challenge, Roddy. Severus thinks he'd be appalling in lace. I bet we could find an outfit that would prove him wrong." He gave an amused grin to the other man as he spoke, watching Sev for a reaction from the corner of his eye.

Severus sputtered and reddened, staring wide-eyed at Lucius for nearly a full minute before regaining his composure. He looked at his robes, at Roddy, and back at Lucius. "It has to be clean, and it can't show any skin I'm not showing now. Those are my terms."

Roddy regained vertical like a pendulum swinging back. "I accept!"

He grinned wickedly, and held a hand out to help Lucius up. "We can meet those terms, we can. Technically."

"Of course clean, Severus. We're Wizards. Don't be ridiculous. I was even thinking we could buy things if we wanted them."

Lucky laughed, and looked at Roddy, using the proffered hand to spring to his feet. "I'm not sure which technicalities you're debating, but this will, at the least, be entertaining."

"Come upstairs. We'll be better to do this where the closets are," Roddy started toward the stairs in the hall. "And more importantly to some of us, my room has a door that closes, so no one will see these shenanigans until we're quite through."

"If we wanted to be really offensive, I could pull off some David of Apples-era court dress, but I just don't think that green would look right against his skin. Too yellow. I'm inclined toward dark blues and blacks, here. What do you think?" He started up the stairs, looking back to ensure Severus was following them.

"I do not want to look like some damnable Ravenclaw," Severus protested, following Roddy up the stairs. "I look perfectly acceptable in Slytherin green, if you insist upon using colours."

You really just agreed to let these two queers dress you in lace, didn't you. This is going to be the end of your dignity, Severus.

Oh, stuff it. What dignity?

One hand pressed to his mouth for a moment, Lucky looked rather pensive. "Silver, I think, for accent. And it's definitely time to teach him some variety in his pallette." He kept moving up the stairs. "Perhaps there's a darker shade of purple that would suit him, if he's so determined to avoid blue."

"And definitely your room. We don't want to give anyone ideas. They can be a bit much for me, at times. I think poor Sev here would flip, especially if he's half dressed at the time."

"I think the purple might throw back an unkind wash, but definitely silver for accents. There's no way he can support gold with that colouring." Roddy hurried the two into his room and closed the door, before any of his cousins noticed. "You know, I bet Ceofine's got something left from the last war... When Auntie's spy battalion wore mostly blues and dark greens. Don't know how much of that is lace, though. It was a war, after all."

He pulled open the closet -- practically a pocket dimension -- and started picking through it, occasionally tossing an item out onto the floor. A cream-coloured leotard, a deep indigo longcoat made of embroidered butterflies linked with lace, a black poet's shirt... He caught the red leather pants in mid air, swapping them for the same cut in green.

"I have more clothes than all of Wales. Perils of being the same size as at least five other members of the family who are a couple hundred years older..." He leaned out of the closet, holding a slim black turtleneck, made of lotus-patterned lace.

Severus paled at most of what Roddy came up with, but the longcoat and the turtleneck didn't look too terrible. Maybe he could manage this without becoming a laughingstock. Roddy had been right about his hair, after all.

"Here, Lucius. This is what I got you for your birthday. You can play dress up with me." He looked sourly up at his fellow Englishman, and then slouched onto the edge of Roddy's bed, smirking slightly.

You're out of your mind, Severus. You know there are going to be photos.

Fuck it. If Roddy's as good as he says he is, maybe I'll have them framed. 'The one time in my life I looked good', I'll label them.

"I think it depends on the shade, but perhaps you're right. And it's amazing the sorts of things that one finds in the wardrobe of a spy. After all, they had to blend in."

He looked at Severus, and laughed. "I see. I'm not sure which of these things I'd actually fit in, given how much Lestrange here favours skin tight. But if you want me to strip?" he offered, a slight hint of teasing in his voice, as he reached for a button on his cream coloured linen shirt.

Severus squawked in protest, accidentally bouncing himself off the corner of the bed, onto the floor. "Merlin's bloody balls, Lucky, you'd wear this stuff on purpose?"

He was intentionally avoiding any comments that might induce Lucius to remove clothing. He'd never be able to change in the same room with them if he had to look at Lucky, first. The man was very well put together, and even a glimpse would render Sev unable to look at his own reflection in so much as a spoon for weeks to come. He was, in a word, envious.

"Are you having at my taste in clothes?" Roddy balled up a forest-green silk robe with indigo and silver embroidered trim, and pitched it at Sev's head. "And be careful with that. It's older than your great-granddame, it is."

He smirked at Lucky. "Sorry, you and my closet don't go together. You and Maitiu's closet, on the other hand, would come to a great accord."

"Some of it, Severus. And yes, I know that most of your things wouldn't fit me, Roddy. We're built differently, and I have my own closet of wonders at home. Perhaps not as large, but then there's the clothing storage in the attics, as well."

Lucky teasingly undid the top button of his shirt, hoping to provoke a reaction, but not actually intending to strip, or at least not yet. After all, the goal was to make Severus beautiful. He could play with clothes any time he wanted.

"I'm not terribly certain that Maitiu would want me in his things, Roddy. He's rather territorial, from what I've noticed."

He paused to watch Severus again. "Perhaps I shall let you in on a secret, Sev. The trick to looking spectacular in nearly anything, is certainty. As long as you are confident in it, it doesn't matter if it's skin-tight women's clothing. Taste does matter, but without confidence, it's much harder."

Severus stared at anything that wasn't Lucius as the button came undone. He would not see.

"I'm going to hold you to proving that point, later. Not now -- please, not now. But, later, I want to see you look good in women's clothes, in a public place." He was just being snippy, certainly, but the point was clear. He thought Lucky was full of shit.

He carefully unfurled the robe Roddy had thrown at him. It was an impressive piece of work, and one he wouldn't be ashamed to wear. It wasn't lace, of course, which made it out of bounds for the theme of the current project, but it was something he might ask about, some other time.

"Maitiu can stuff it in his ass. It isn't really his closet, anyway." Roddy snorted, derisively. "He just likes to take any excuse, he does."

He stepped out of the closet and licked Lucky's ear, while Sev wasn't looking. It was as good a time as any.

"You can try it on, if you like, Sev. I'm sure you'll do Uncle Donovan proud, in it." He smiled encouragingly. "He was a bit like you, when he still breathed."

Lucky muffled a squeak, as Roddy licked his ear. He hadn't been expecting that. "You can even come shopping with me, to prove it. And I will wear it out in public. After all, no one said anything about a dress, Severus."

"And you can fetch things for me from that closet, then, if you intend me to try them on. I'd rather not be on the bad side of anyone you live with, if I don't have to be."

Severus looked up at Lucky, hearing the squeak, and then at Roddy. "Really? I do like it, but I don't want to -- I don't know, leave a thumbprint on it, or something."

He held his hands up at the look Roddy levelled at him. "Okay, okay. You're serious."

Standing, he turned his back to them both and hung the green robe across his shoulders as he slipped out of the one he wore. It was quite a trick, but one he was relatively good at, after five years at Hogwarts. It looked like a Chinese cut, he noticed, as he fastened the frogs, down the front. He thought the high collar and scribe's cuffs were a nice touch. Finally, he turned back, leaving his own robes on the floor.

"I think it fits a little tightly, for a robe, but I like the style. I should get one like this, someday. I mean, if it actually looks good." He looked up at the other two, hoping for some acknowledgement.

"One of these times, I will. Wait 'til he's having it out of Conall, sure, but I will." Roddy grinned at Lucky. "We'll get you into his old fencing outfit -- that blue one with the ruffles and the silk stole. I don't know how many idiots he's disarmed with his clothing, wearing that."

His eyes lit on Severus, and words just stopped exiting his mouth as his jaw hung open. Standing stunned, he elbowed Lucky, and it was long moments before he could speak at all. Severus looked like a young emperor of some foreign land, come to make some bold and vital proclamation. Even the uncertainty in his eyes couldn't quite ruin the effect.

Roddy was struck stupid at the sight.

"Nonsense," Lucky said with a grin. "Having convinced you that you can look good in things, you can have a whole new wardrobe for whenever you aren't at home," he said with a grin. "And I won't be surprised if you get to keep that, it looks so well on you. Especially since it has this one here speechless."

He stuck his head out the door. "Mrs. Lestrange?" he called. "I don't suppose you have a camera I could use?"

"But, I haven't even seen it, yet!" Severus protested, before Roddy closed the closet door, to reveal the full length mirror on the back. He stepped hesitantly into view, afraid to raise his eyes until he was sure he'd see all of himself in one go. After a deep breath, he looked up and stopped just short of snarling something about magic mirrors, again. This was Roddy's mirror, and Roddy sure as hell didn't need magic to make him look good.

Confident, Lucky had said, so Sev held his head up and squared his shoulders. They were right. He looked good. No one else would ever see this, though. He couldn't dress like this at school, and even if he could, it would in no way alter the embedded popular opinion. Then he'd just be the creepy, greasy git with nice clothes. Maybe someday, he'd have an opportunity to make a new impression on some people. Maybe then it would matter.

"We've got a magicked-up Polaroid in the bottom of the lacquer cabinet in the greatroom," Brigid called back up the stairs. "What's worth taking pictures of?"

Sufficiently curious, she went to fetch the camera and bring it up to them.

Roddy just leaned against the wall and looked smug. Slightly dazed, but no less smug, for it. As long as he kept his shoulder blades touching the wall, he wouldn't do something that would be regrettable in the long term.

"We've got Sev looking majestic up here," he called with a grin. "I want to preserve it, in case he forgets."

He smiled as Brighid slipped into the room, and spoke almost immediately. "Ach, don't you look just like another son of Brendan's? Doesn't he, Roddy? Just like when Maitiu was young!"

"You see why we want the picture, then," Lucky said with a smile. "Because we can't possibly let him forget this."

"Maitiu's built like a brick, Ma. There's no earthly way this little slip looks a whit like him. He looks like Uncle Donovan." By this point, Roddy's fingernails were so tightly fixed in his upper arms that there was no way to avoid marks, and he'd be lucky as a four-footed rabbit not to bleed.

"You know, you might be right. I'll have to find those photos of Donovan wearing it." Brigid looked speculative as she handed the camera to Lucius.

Severus turned from the mirror, eyes half-filled with pride. The other half, of course, was still uncertainty. "Fine, Lucky, I won't kill you for taking a photo, this time, but the bets are off when the lace comes out."

It was about as close to 'Ooh! Can you make me a copy, too?' as he was going to get. This was something he really didn't want to forget. Maybe he'd even show it to Lily, but then he'd have to explain. It was Lucius's birthday. Surely, that was explanation enough.

Taking the camera, he focused on Severus, waiting a moment for the appropriate range of expressions before snapping a picture. "There," he said. We can look at it in a couple of minutes, and see if it passes muster. And now that you know it can be done, it can be done more often." He looked at the slowly developing picture, and waited for it to be done, before handing it over.

Like any Wizards' photo, it looked back at him -- sternly, regally, and commandingly, in this case. Severus could feel his face warming as he looked at it.

"This is the only good picture anyone's taken of me. I look real here." He felt his eyes start to dampen, but crammed that back down. He would show this to his mother when he got home. She should see him like this, even only once.

Roddy finally moved, wiping his hands off, carefully, on his kilt as he stepped away from the wall. He took Sev's shoulders in his hands and rested his chin on one, looking over his shoulder. "That's because you are real. Not just some half-blood Prince, but a genuine force of nature. You're not just real. You're unignorable, you are."

"Roddy, you're embarrassing him." Brigid stepped closer and held out her hand. "Let me see it! You two are far too pleased. Sure, I have to know, now."

Roddy tipped Sev's hand to show the photo to his mother.

"You know, they're right. You do look like Donny in that." Brigid smiled, in that way that only mothers do. "I'll have to make some copies of that. I know we'll want one to hang in the hall, and you'll want one to take home with you, and another for Lucius, here, who's giving me a look."

"Thank you, Mrs Lestrange," Lucky said politely, before turning to Sev. "This is what we see, Sev. What we wanted you to see." He stopped there, before he got to saying more than Sev seemed ready to hear.

"And having seen this, you know we can manage the other. This is why I, at least, like having a large wardrobe. It lets me find the clothes that not only suit me, but suit my mood, my purposes."

He paused for a moment, struck by what Severus had said. "Is that why you hate pictures?" he asked. "Because no one has taken good pictures of you before? We will definitely have to continue to remedy that one."

"No, I hate pictures because I don't like people looking at me. Or touching me. Get off." Severus elbowed Roddy, without even looking. "I have a small wardrobe because I don't need much, and what I have is more than enough for most applications. It keeps the potions off my skin, and the eyes, as well."

He left out the part about how his wardrobe consisted entirely of the robe currently crumpled on the floor and three pairs of greying underwear, one of which, he still wore.

Roddy jerked back a couple steps. "Sorry. I forgot. Happens, it does."

He grinned wickedly at Lucky as a few disparate thoughts came together in a terrible idea. "It's your birthday. That means we're going to the pub, after supper. I call kilt party!"

Brigid covered her eyes and sighed. "Roddy, at least put on a shirt before you go out, this time..."

Lucky chuckled, both at Roddy's plans, and Brighid's commentary. "But Sev and I don't have kilts, Roddy. And we promised Severus lace first, anyways."

Lucky snorted. "Your wardrobe is not sufficient, Severus. And it will get larger, even if you never turn into a clothes horse like Roddy and I." With that statement, he stretched, his spine popping as his arms extended over his head.

"Merlin, that feels better," he said.

"Yes, Ma. I'll wear sufficient clothing out the door." Roddy shooed his mother out of the room, closing the door behind her.

"You don't have a kilt." Roddy snorted derisively, and dove back into the closet.

"The hell you don't," he cried, tossing a few yards of wool and buckles at Lucky's head, and carrying another out for Sev. He'd gotten wiser than to throw things at Sev's head, too often. "You're my family, and neither of those cousins is going to argue that point."

"But, of course, lace first. I promised lace, and lace I'll deliver, I will." He bent to pick through the heap of cloth on the floor, picking out the eggshell-coloured leotard. "But, you'll wear this, first, so we don't have any accidents with your skin."

"It bloody well is sufficient," he snapped, grabbing the leotard from Roddy and turning his back to put it on beneath the green robe. "What in Merlin's name could I need to do, that I can't do in flat black?"

He grimaced, trying to adjust the crotch of the skin-tight garment. It was really not a pleasant state of affairs, but he understood that Roddy was trying to meet his terms. Turning, with the robe still opened, he held out a hand for the next garment.

Lucky quickly reached up and caught the kilt before it hit him in the head. "Aww, you really do love me, Roddy. It's even in colours that suit." He smiled, and folded the material that was in a forest green with pale blue accents neatly.

"You can do things in flat black, Severus, but sometimes a bit of colour is flattering, is all. You've seen that, in what you just tried."

Lucky sighed. "At least cream coloured linen will suit this," he said, tugging at his own shirt, "even if I might want to transfigure it a bit to work better."

Without a thought, Roddy simply pressed the black leathers into Sev's hand.

"Trousers first," he choked, staring in fascination at the heap of cloth at his feet. He picked up the black lace turtleneck and held it out to Sev. "Then this. We'll work from there."

Severus wedged himself into the trousers, noting that leather does not slide on as easily as one would think it might. After a few moments spent staring at the lacing on the front, he decided to ignore it for the time, since the trousers were tight enough to stay up on their own. He snatched the shirt from Roddy and slid it on, tucking it into the trousers and passing the green robe back.

As he looked down at himself, he noticed that the leotard was terribly close to his skin colour. In that, Roddy had chosen with a purpose in mind, and Sev was starting to see how it all went together. He turned his back, again, and tried to tighten the laces on the trousers, noticing that they were, in fact, even less comfortable than the leotard. He was certain he was wearing them wrong, and that there was some trick to not crushing himself quite so severely.

Finally, he asked for help. "I don't understand these trousers at all."

Lucky blinked, and then leaned against the wall, trying to laugh silently, with the occasional bit leaking out. "Merlin, Roddy, you take lace seriously. I meant as trim, but if you can manage this much, I'd love to see it."

Having decided that in this case, discretion was the better part of valor, he simply stood and watched, letting Roddy assist Sev with his trousers.

"I forbid you to doubt me in this. I can do it. My family's done it for centuries." Roddy glared at Lucky for a long moment, before turning his attention back to Sev.

"Forgive me this. I'm gonna have to see what you've done, before I fix it." He knelt and waited for Sev's nod before he started to adjust the lacing. "Oh! OH. I'll tell you what, Sev. Take a look at Lucky's trousers. No, I'm not joking, just take a good look at his crotch -- Sorry, Lucky. He's not got the art, yet -- Do you see how everything's off to the left? Turn yourself around and do that. They'll lace up easy when you're in them right."

It took Severus quite a moment to get used to the idea that Roddy was staring at his crotch. It took him a longer moment to adjust to the idea that he was being instructed to study the way Lucky arranged himself in his trousers. After a few seconds of observation, though, he began to understand the principle.

Turning his back to the room again, he unsnapped the leotard and pushed everything left, like Roddy had suggested. The bulge down the inside of his leg fit far more easily into the leather, since he wasn't trying to fit it against the conjunction of several seams, and sure enough, the trousers closed just fine.

He turned back to the other two. "Does that look right?"

Taking a quick look at Sev's crotch, he spoke. "Almost. I hadn't thought about the fact that you mostly wore robes, and that that wouldn't make this into something obvious for you."

Smiling at Sev, Lucky commented again. "You'll want to tighten the laces. Half the point of wearing leather like that, it to turn it into a second skin. It both looks good that way, and serves as a modicum of protection, or it can, depending on the leather in question."

"Nah, Lucky, he's got it right. You're just used to looking at me, you are." Roddy said it with a saucy wink over his shoulder as he knelt, again, to see to the lacing. "I think he's got a bit more to arrange than these trousers are cut for. I can fake it out, though."

He studied the complications before him, with a professional eye, before tugging at the strings. "Bear with me, boyo. Won't be but another few seconds."

At last, he stood and stepped back, examining his work. Sev was nothing like dressed, really, but Roddy could tell that he could start a barfight by walking into a room, dressed like that.

"That's as good as these'll get on you. I'll have to get the girls down from the far lands to make some for your shape." Roddy tapped the mirror as he dug through the heap of cloth on the floor. "Looks good enough to start a war, I'll tell you. Have a look."

Severus closed his eyes as Roddy pulled at the strings on his trousers. He's just trying to get the clothes onto you, not off you. Let him work.

He opened his eyes and stepped toward the mirror as Roddy moved away. He looked a bit bare, to his own eyes, and he had no idea what Roddy would do to correct that problem. But, something nagged... "I think you might be right about the blue."

"I didn't say they didn't work, I was just explaining the mechanics," Lucky said. "And of course he's right about the blue, Severus. It would suit you, although not the paler blues I wear at times. Those, I think would look silly."

"And it's not just the way you wear leather, Roddy. I do have a pair of my own, after all."

"Aye, you've got your own, but it's hardly like you to spend time staring at your own package, Lucky," Roddy teased, sorting through the heap, looking for something viable.

After a few false starts, he pulled up what appeared to be a poncho, made of tightly-woven lace, in the pattern of a forest full of animals. As he shook it, a few of the deer bolted into the trees. "I'm wrong. Give me the shirt, and try this. I know you think it's too colourful. I'd be daft to miss that point, but it is mostly greens and browns."

"Ah, wait." He pulled a peacock blue shirt from the pile and tossed it to Sev. "Wear that under it."

He wasn't sure about Roddy's eyesight, looking at the contrast, but he played along, trading one turtleneck for the other, and then draping on the full-circle poncho. As he settled it onto himself, birds scattered through the pattern, adding bright spots of colour. It really was awfully bright, at a glance, but he looked up into the mirror and saw the effect Roddy had been aiming for.

"Dryad?" He wracked his brain for the correct word. Dryads were female, weren't they? And fauns weren't fond of clothes. Magical creatures had never been his strong point. Maybe something a little more familiar, then. "Druid?"

Either way, he didn't look entirely human, any more. The poncho's animals wandered through its forest, and the peacock blue shirt shone like sky through the lace. His hair was still more or less as Roddy had done it earlier, if a little rumpled from changing shirts. It looked great, but he didn't look like himself, any more. On the whole, it was kind of creepy.

"Or something," Lucky said, unsure how to describe the effect. "It looks good, but not at all in way I'd imagined. "You'll have to let me try sometime with things at the Manor, we'll get a totally different look."

"And that's true, Roddy, but one does look, at least long enough to know what effect others will get by looking at it."

"It's incredible, Roddy. I just..." Severus looked a little ill. "I think I need to take it off, now. I don't think the enchantment agrees with me."

He struggled out of the poncho, tangling himself in it quite severely before he managed to successfully extricate himself. With a shiver, he passed it back to Roddy.

"The next time there's enough of a holiday that you'll get me for a dress-up doll, you're welcome to try, Lucius." The response was tart, but not quite ill-humoured.

"Sorry, sorry... My own cockwitted fault. This one's a bit older than it looks, and made for a certain bit of doing. I didn't figure on it giving you any trouble, but that's what I get." Roddy looked almost as embarrassed as he did apologetic.

"So, do we do the pub tonight, or is it tiddlywinks for your birthday, Lucky?" He offered a mildly antagonistic wink as he began to put things back in the closet.

Lucky laughed, and spoke in an exaggeratedly feminine fashion. "Oh, my very own dress up doll. How lovely." He fluttered his eyelashes at Severus flirtatiously.

"I was waiting for you to finish with your own fun first, Roddy. Besides, I need your help to put on a kilt," he said, the flirtation in his voice honest this time. "It's not like I've worn one before."

Roddy purred, softly, eyes glittering as he stepped toward Lucky -- and stopped cold. He was not going to do this in front of Sev. Not in a closed room, with no other distractions.

"If you're feeling brighter than Lucky, here, I think you can find your way out of the trousers and into the kilt. It's a fake, anyway. I wouldn't inflict the genuine article on a pair of Englishmen. Neither of you would ever find your way into it, and you'd be out of it five times an hour, for hanging it wrong." He laughed and picked up the one he'd intended for Lucius. "This one, it'll practically fit itself. Buckles on both sides, and obviously, the left side goes on top."

Severus picked up the pre-folded pseudo-kilt that Roddy had picked out for him. It was in different colours from the one for Lucky, and not the same as Roddy's either. That was something to ask about, later, especially since Roddy had said he was dressing them as family.

But, Roddy was right. It did look pretty easy. "Merlin's arse, Lucky, confused by this? Maybe you have been staring at Roddy's -- uh -- staring at Roddy too long!"

He turned his back and gratefully stripped off the pants, finally unfastening the leotard, with a sigh. He held the kilt at his back. Right side first, and a buckle. Left side over it, and two more. It really didn't go with the shirt, though, despite the fact that the plaid was a rich green and violet, streaked with the same peacock blue.

"Ah, Severus. The true Slytherin, and yet, he misses the point," Lucky said, shifting his hips as he spoke.

He rolled his eyes at Roddy as he took the kilt. "And there you go, taking half the fun out of this." With a lack of trouble that made it apparent he'd been playing around the whole time, Lucky slipped out of his jeans unselfconsciously, before wrapping the kilt around his hips and tightening the buckles.

"You're wearing too much. Both of you." Roddy eyed them critically, each in turn. "What goes beneath a kilt? I know Lucky should know the answer to this one..."

He leaned in closer, lowering his voice for Lucky. "I'll be more than happy to teach you the right way, later. And the right way to do a few other things, too, if you like."

As he stepped back, he grabbed at the closet doorframe, swinging halfway into the pandimensional clothing archive, to come out with a cream-coloured, laced-collared cotton shirt. "You need a shirt, Sev."

"What point? It doesn't make you any less daft not to have noticed the buckles."

Pulling off the all-too-tight tops he wore, Severus easily put on the much larger shirt he'd been handed. It hung down nearly to his knees, but looked like it was supposed to do that.

He considered Roddy's implications carefully and swallowed hard. "A thong? Tell me the answer is a thong."

Lucky snickered ridiculously. "I wanted Sev in the kilt, before I finished wearing mine properly, Roddy," he said. He nodded at Roddy with a slight glow in his eyes for the other suggestion, before slipping one hand up his kilt, and pulling his boxers down. As they slipped down his legs, he moved to kick them off.

Roddy picked up Lucky's boxers and spun them around one finger. "The shirt gets tucked in, Sev. Keeps the worst of the wool from getting to the best of you. Nothing quite like getting a wool-burn at the worst possible time..."

He shuddered, dramatically, as punctuation, before eyeing Lucky like candy. With a millisecond heated smile, he turned his attention back to Sev. "And yes, we do expect you to wear it right, or you'll end up pissing on yourself, later. There are reasons for all things."

Severus was halfway through tucking in the shirt when Roddy's second line of commentary began. "And you wear these things on purpose? I'm just not seeing the benefit."

He finished tucking in the shirt, straightened it, and looked down at his bare feet. He had boots, but the kilt showed more leg than his robes ever had. "I don't suppose you expect me to go bare-ankled, do you?"

In actuality, he was stalling. Delaying the moment in which he'd give in to the inevitable and take off the ratty briefs. It was less the idea of not wearing them, and more the idea that someone might see them that disturbed him. Finally, he slipped his hands up under the back of the kilt and shimmied out of his briefs, kicking them under his robe.

"Aww shite, Roddy. This shirt isn't long enough for that," he said with genuine frustration. "And it's much easier to piss in, I'd imagine, Sev, amongst the other benefits."

He looked at Roddy in supplication. "Anyone likely to have a shirt I can borrow? It's not like I want burns down there, after all."

"I wear robes. It's not like this is going to be that much more difficult, really. Or really that different, I'd imagine." Severus looked unimpressed.

"Socks for both of you, shirt for Lucky." Roddy dove back into the closet and emerged with the appropriate items after a short scuffle.

He handed a pair of long, white socks to Sev. "You'd think that, until you realise there's three layers to miss when you're not wearing pants."

"If you get burns, tonight," he whispered to Lucky, pressing the clothing into his hands, "it'll be because you forgot the potion, not because your shirt's not long enough."

Lucky face flushed for a moment, a flash of heat lighting his normally icy blue eyes. Taking the proffered shirt in one hand, he slowly undid the buttons on his shirt, before sliding it off and pulling the new one over his head. "Thanks," he said, before tucking it into the kilt carefully. "That's quite a bit better."

"Boys!" Brigid's voice called up the stairs. "Stop tormenting poor Severus and come to dinner! I'll not have you going for drinks with no food in you!"

"Yes, Ma!" Roddy called back. "As soon as we're dressed. Lucky's stuck on a buckle..." He trailed off into incoherent giggling.

Tidying up, a bit, he stepped toward Sev, to reclaim the slightly-worn turtleneck. Absently, he reached out and touched Sev's cheek, catching his chin on a finger. His eyes cooled slowly, looking down into Sev's patent confusion, and Roddy realised what he'd been about to do.

"You look like blood of mine, you do. It'll be all my wits to keep the trouble out of you, tonight."

Severus blushed faintly and swatted at Roddy's hand. "Corners, Roddy. I sit in them for a reason."

He pulled on his boots and fastened the buttons up the sides. "I'll leave the two of you to whatever you're not doing. I can smell the cabbage from here, and three days is enough to tell me it's better hot than cold."

He put his hand on the door, waiting for an objection before he opened it.

[sans objection, this can be taken as an exit]

Lucky chuckled. "Looks like the innuendo finally got to Sev, after all," he said. With that statement, he pressed himself against Roddy for a kiss, wrapping his arms around the irishman's waist. After a minute or so he came up for air, a beatific smile on his face. "C'mon, Roddy. Your Mum's got dinner waiting, and if we take too long, there'll be no guessing about what we're up to here."

With that, he let go of Roddy, and turned for the door. As he reached it, he turned his head to look over his shoulder. "Coming?" he asked, a flirtatious look in his eyes.

"Not yet. I'm not so easy as all that, even for you," Roddy quipped, killing the lights with one hand and swatting at Lucky's ass with the other.

[DONE]

[Goes to Growing Up is Optional.]

Amortentia Dolorosa

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